The Frantic Phone Call

Yall Betty just called all in a tizzy, wanting to talk to Ron. I told her that Ron was in a meeting right now with the Aflac guy and that he would have to call her back. She said that she really needed to talk to him that its an emergency!!! I was like ok Betty whats wrong, do you need me to come and get you? Do you need to go to the hospital? Whats wrong? She responded with....I don't want to tell you. I was like ok...do you need me to go get Ron is it REALLY important. She said, yes I can't get the movie out of the VCR. I said what? She said the movie won't come out of the VCR! I said ok Betty I can help you. First is it the VCR or the DVD player? She said its the DVD player. I said ok, it it on? She said I don't know I just keep pushing the button and nothing happens. I said ok, it is on? She said I think so. I said is it lite up? She said no. I said ok, push the power button. She said ok, the lights to it came on. I said ok now push the open/close button and wait a moment. She said ok, OMG your a genius. It worked! Now how do I get it to close. I said once you take the DVD out...push the open/close button again. She said oh thank you honey you saved me. I would just like everyone to note that today i just became some little old ladies hero! Who says I couldn't be a 911 operator?

Is it wooden? Cause if it isn't wooden it won't work!

We have all heard the old wifes tales about how to get rid of the hicups. You can scare them away, you can say let me hear you hicup...come on let me hear you, you can drink water through a wash cloth, you can drink water through a straw, you can eat a spoon full of sugar, you can do so many things. And until yesterday I thought I had heard them all, but Shalisse pulled a new one on me. I call her over the intercom type of system thingy that we have hear at work and I tell her "Pooh, I have the hicups." And I swear on my life yall this is what she said back. "Put a wooden pencil in your mouth and drink water." I said "what?" She said "thats what they use to make us do in school, put a wooden pencil in your mouth and drink water. It has to be water." SO i tried it, it not only did not make my hicups go away, but I got to laughing so hard that I got water all over my shirt. I got kind of irritated at the whole thing so I called her and told her hey I still have the hicups, and now my shirt is all wet. She said "Is it a wooden pencil? Cause it won't work if its not wooden." I was like yes its wooden we work in the cheapest place on earth of course the pencil is wooden. So I tried it again, and this time it did make my hicups go away but it still got my shirt all wet. lol